What is this blog about.
The life of my lost 30 years starts to move by the three powers, words, persons, and love.
My dream
My dream is to change the world. ”All are born to be happy.” I strongly hope the world becomes like this
Looking back on the history, even very powerful and influential persons weren’t able to change everything becomes happy, because ultimately one person is mere one. Not the person, but persons change the world.
No third time
Atomic bombs were dropped in Hiroshima and Nagasaki in 1945. If the third bomb dropped, our planet would be end.
About myself, In 1996 my value collapsed, In 2000 my heart destructed. I don’t think the third time has came, but I almost got the third time two years ago. It was my 10th hospitalization in August 8, 2020. I was hospitalized by Hiroshima government.
After three months and I started a manual job, but I failed.
I lost my confidence and dreams 100 percent and decided to stay a mental facility for good.
Turing a point
Staying the facility for one year and six months my plan was changed. I wanted to work again. The reason of this is that I recalled one of my dreams. I wanted to work in Osaka. The second biggest city in Japan. I tried several times, but I didn’t make it. I didn’t want to fail this time, so I was cautious to take actions.
In September, 2020 I suddenly wanted to go to Kagoshima, southern part of Japan.It was 370 mile south from Hiroshima. I took express buses to go there on 29 and 30 September.I wanted to go to Kagoshima, because it is the place where Mr. Inamori Kazuo, a Japanese prominent entrepreneur , was born.He is the model of my thoughts.Watching Sakurajima island from a ferry boat, my dream is coming down to me. It’s “ Change the world.”
Words change the world
Since I lived in Puerto Rico 40 years ago I have studied languages. I’ve been looking for good words and collecting them. My favorite words is “ If you can dream it, you can do it” by Walt Disney. I’ve never gave up my dreams because of this word. I can’t live without dreams. Now I listen to several radio English programs.
I listen to them and they teach a very important lesson. Never give up and keep on dreaming.
Persons change the world
I’ve never asked others for helps. I thought asking for helps meant weakness, but I’ve changed my idea because of my 10th hospitalization in 2020. I’ve decided to receive maximum supports. From a hospital, from Hiroshima municipality, daytime staying facility for mental disorders, home visiting nurses , house chores assistances, and house accounting supports. I started a job for disabilities in 2022. I didn’t take any of these before 2020. I’ve been bipolar for 30 years, but I applied for a disable certificates card last year. I didn’t apply it, because I didn’t want any helps from anyone.
Many many people help and support me.
I learned the world works only by helping each others from this experience. No one is perfect, so the only way to survive is to help each other. I was wrong for a long time that depending to others was loser.
With many persons’ supports my life’s slowly begun to be getting better.
Love changes the world
Every problem comes from lackness of love. I’ve been lucky I receive love from many people. So I’ve never imagined love would totally disappeared in 2020. It was when my father passed away. He was my last supporter. It was fights against loneliness.I tried suicides twice. before, but I didn’t think of that this time, but I had been crushed by empty feelings.
I received a letter from a friend from South Africa for the first time in 30 years. But I couldn’t return it for a year, because I thought my life was miserable. My friend said the cause of my mental disease was the lackness of love. I think he’s talking about love with a girl. But for now it is a big hurdle for me. If love can cure mental disease, it will be a new finding and change the mental disease world.
Summary
I’ve always wanted to change the world. I’ve been saying it a word changes the world, a person changes the world for 15 years.
I said a word not words, I said a person not persons changed the world. They were singular not plural. A word and a person can’t change the world. One is mere one. I noticed this a few days ago. Love has been added at the begin of the year. Actually I don’t know what love is. But I believe words, persons, and love together can changes the world. Maybe I’ll be lost or confused from now on. But I keep in mind words, persons, love and I can walk to my dream step by step.